she is shy

So, many of you are aware of my "Year in the life" project I do here at the school.  The most challenging kids are the ones that don't like the idea of me following them around school.  I guess they think that I am going to embarrass them or take a photo of them doing something against school rules.  Honestly, I don't care what they are doing...I just need to get a feel of the year from them as it progresses.  It is very difficult for me to get the time to follow the students during the school day because I do not have child care.  My mom comes once in a while now and I have to figure out how to manage my time so that I can get into the classrooms.  VERY challenging.  I have to plan ahead so that I have child care, talk with the teachers so I don't surprise them (honestly, NO ONE has ever complained about me being in their room during class...it is really super nice of them and makes my work that much easier), and give a little heads up to the kids I follow...sometimes.  The shy kids are hard to photograph as well...like this subject.  She is BEAUTIFUL and the camera loves her...but, she is shy.  It is difficult, but when I get some gems it makes it all the more satisfying.  Like these:

Unexpected

I met a new friend last night.  Because of privacy issues...(I prefer to keep names and specifics confidential for my friends sake), I will keep some of this general.  My good friends have welcomed a new baby into their lives.  My friends are gay.  You will understand the importance of why I am saying that in a moment.

When I first got the good news that their family would be growing, I was so happy.  I had butterflies in my stomach and honestly could not focus on much else except the minute to minute updates of when they met their child to when they all came home.  Because Manny is turning a year old in two weeks, I am going through some things I no longer need.  Every time I came across something to discard, I would immediately think of my friends and wonder what they would need and how I could help.  I always have a first instinct of wanting to be helpful, useful, making someone else's life better.  My constant quest that sometimes gets confused with being a busy body or too pushy.  (yes, I am aware of this)

As I got ready to meet the baby for the first time, I left my husband with the kids, packed the car with gifts, and gently placed the cake I made on the front seat floor for safe keeping.  I was excited and nervous to see my friends.  It seemed like I hadn't seen them in a very long time and now they were going to be there with their baby!  I arrived early.  I couldn't help my excitement.  I was self conscious of trying not to be too "helpful" and just let them be when they arrived.  The moment finally came when I saw the baby out of the car seat and my friend was holding him in his hands...extending them out to me, placing this beautiful baby in my arms.  I was overwhelmed with emotion that caught me off guard and could not control the tears.  I cried for the joy of the moment, the awe of what was happening, my friends looking so sparkly and new.  I cried for the gift of this child who was wanted so very very badly and was given to a home that is over flowing with love and family.  I cried for every person who came before who had never known this joy of a child because of their sexuality.  I don't even like to say sexuality...it sounds negative.  I thought of all the men and women unable to have children in years past because of society and I thought how incredibly wonderful my friends landed safely in a place where they could.

I was overwhelmed with emotion.  I still am.  I instantly loved their family, and love watching them with their baby.

Everything is good.  Everything seems right.

Now, my baby is crying, waking up from a nap.  I am so lucky to know the joy of that sound.

4:00 A.M.

Last night I went to see Liz and Ann Callaway in their show "BOOM" that they performed at Harvard.  The venue was beautiful and the audience was receptive.  Liz and Ann were once again perfection in every note and did not disappoint.

While I do not particularly care for some of the song selection and if I had heard it on the radio, probably would have changed the station, I was on the edge of my seat the whole time while listening to them sing.  They were moving, funny, emotional, and as always beyond talented.  Liz's crystal clear voice once again woke up the singer in me, making me want to jump up there with them and be the third sister.  Ann's sultry deep, rich jazzy voice just makes any cold winter New England night seem like you are sitting in front of a roaring fire with a brandy in your hand under a fur blanket.  It was heaven.

The cherry on the sundae was spending the time with my friends who made me laugh all night long.  I got a massive headache from laughing, and yes...I am still laughing recalling all the funny things that happened.

Thank you for a wonderful night well spent!!

After rolling in at 4am, Jose was mad that I didn't spend the night and have more to drink...as he put it "you could have slept until 2pm today!".   That is in my back pocket and will be well used next time around!

Looking forward to spending more time with you guys soon...once I recover from laughing so hard!!

School

Ava LOVES school.  Who wouldn't if you could be a part of her school and how they learn.  It is incredible.  The respect for the child is just off the charts and the willingness to learn what the child wants to learn is incredible.  If she wants to bring in a book that she learned how to "read" (more like memorize...but still, it was a long book) they embrace her thirst for learning and have her read it to her little class and then to the 3 year olds.  As she does, the 3 yr olds sit and pay close attention, hanging on every word.  Ava reads with such expression and speaks nice and clear at a nice volume.  I am so proud of her.  After the long weekend, she cannot wait to return to her classroom where she hugs her teacher and tells her that she missed her.  Her teacher says she missed her too and I absolutely believe it.  It is a community.  A learning place...learning about friends, letters, numbers, animals, plants, trees, Paul Revere, bell making, Ididarod racing, rhyming, bell ringing, carol singing, phases of the moon, why the days are named what they are, and anything else you can think of.  This is her last year at Seaside...she was there last year as well.  She will go on to public school kindergarten where you sit in a circle, line up, have specific activities at specific times, and have to follow rules.  My heart breaks a little every time she expresses her love for school because I know what is coming.  I hope she makes the transition well and that she still has a thirst for learning and an excitement for the next new project.

We were lucky to send her to Seaside for the two years.  I wish it could have been three, but there is no kindergarten program next year.  In any case, whenever she would leave the school and move on, it would be hard.  No matter when.  For now I will try to enjoy her passion for her school and not think about the future.  Today is all I have.  Tomorrow is just my imagination.

So many new things happening...

But, too many to write...it is kind of like I get overwhelmed because I have let this blog slide for too long so now how do I catch you all up??  Life is good right now.  Work is not as hectic as it was before the holidays and I always look forward to this time of year after the craziness of deadlines and squeezing people in for their Christmas gifts and cards.  Don't get me wrong, I kind of thrive on the way things get a bit crazy...I guess I put it on myself.  It always makes this time of year very much appreciated.  I get to organize my desk, work on photos I am more passionate about, and make a list of projects I have to work on now before the spring and summer.

Lately, I am really having fun photographing snow photos...here are a couple from a recent shoot.  Today, we had a snowstorm and school was cancelled.  One of my best friends had to work and they cancelled her sons daycare so he came over to our house.  It is always nice to have him here.  He is the sweetest little toddler.  I really loved being in with the three kids today...made me wish I had had more kids at a younger age...I would not have the energy for it now.

Enjoy the pictures...I will try to make more frequent posts.